Embracing the Fear and Promise of Big Changes with Karla Silver – Ep 22
What’s your default reaction when a big change is looming?
We all face big changes—maybe once or twice in your life, or you might feel like you’re redefining yourself every couple of years. However often it comes up, how you deal with these situations has a major impact on how everything shakes out in the end.
My good friend Karla Silver, a marketing expert, coach, and all-around cool person, joined me on the podcast to talk about new yous, big changes, and the whiteboard of life.
Look for the freedom in the fresh start
Contemplating a big change can seem scary, and there are definitely pitfalls you need to consider and plan for, but at the end of the day, scary is a state of mind! What happens if you reframe how you look at change?
Karla has discovered fresh takes on herself many times, now, and she enjoys the visual of a whiteboard. You can write all your plans, your whole path for your future on that board, but guess what else you can do—you can wipe it off! A clean slate! A fresh start!
What if you looked at every looming change as the freedom to reveal or nourish something novel within yourself? Does that make it feel a bit less scary and a bit more exciting?
Prioritize the “Be”
So often in life, we’re taught that the order of things is Do (the thing) > Be (what the doing turns you into) > Have (what you did the thing to get). The problem is, if you dive into the Do without being clear on the Be, the Do can fall short of your real goals and your truest self, disappointing you in the end.
What if you started with who you want to Be. From there, you can figure out what that version of you needs to Do to get to what you want to Have. You’ll settle so much more comfortably into the goal-setting and goal-achieving if you start with your Be.
Once Karla realized she could Be literally whoever she wanted, regardless of social, parental, or internal expectations, the world of possibilities burst wide open.
What to do when the fear stalls you
However comfortable we are with embracing change and diving into the unknown, most of us still experience a period of fear when some big New Possibility is looming. Karla’s approach to this is to deal with what’s going on in her head, first and foremost. She steps back from the problem, looking at it as an outside observer who isn’t hindered by all those pesky expectations.
Once she’s wrangled a more objective perspective, she fills her naysaying mind with all the positive reinforcement she can find: books, podcasts, and people who reignite her excitement over what she’s capable of creating.
Finally, Karla says she’s been through enough to know that the worry, the urgency will pass. Everything—fear, uncertainty, moments of lack, and all the good stuff, too—it’s all transitory, and remembering that everything is held to this rule can make it easier to live in the moment, embracing all the wonderful and getting through the not-so-great.
Karla and I get personal and dole out some positive vibes on the topic of change in this episode of the Rich Life Revolution podcast, so tune in to get inspired and feel less alone about your next big life transition!